My Aunt Is Hot

(This Post is #1 of my 10 part series: How to Cock Block.)

The Jim Halpert is one of my favorite methods of cock blocking. It’s funny, it’s easy, and it’s really effective. Communicology (The study of human communication) finds that given two contradictory messages, people will believe body language over verbal cues. It makes sense: Think about a little kid lying about writing on the wall. They’re antsy with their hands, and they’re looking around. You know they’re lying.

The concept of the “Jim Halpert” is to capitalize on that phenomenon. One of my golden rules of cock blocking is never say anything bad about someone else. It’s dirty playing, and can backfire really bad. However, if you don’t say anything, and the person happens to infer your opinon via your facial expressions, that’s fair game.

Let’s say you’re in a triplet, another guy and one girl. You can listen to the guy inevitably yammering away about something that will probably try to make him sound cool to the girl. If he wasn’t, you wouldn’t need to cock block right? So, as he is saying things you need to do two things: Make eye contact with the girl, and critique things he says with your face. The third optional thing is to make sure the guy doesn’t see you. However, most people aren’t going to say anything because you sound a

little insane saying, “Are you making faces?” Especially when the answer “Constantly… don’t you?” comes flying back.

This method earned the name “Jim Halpert” after a character on the american television show: The Office. Jim is a very animated guy, and you can practically read him like a book by his face. Since the setting is an office, it wouldn’t be appropriate to ask or say things like, “Really?!”, “You’re kidding right?”, and “Holy shit”. Instead, Jim uses body language to communicate to his coworkers his opinion.